So how do you tell the difference? How do you spot the genuine friendship seekers
from the
game players? Look for these tell-tale signs in their conversations and/or emails:
- Early requests for your telephone number/address (never give these details
unless you are
totally sure about the person you are dealing with).
- Fastracking to very intimate conversations.
- Rushed conversations
- Superficial conversations - i.e. lacking in depth or meaning. Don't
misunderstand here. In
the early days of
conversation, there will inevitably be some "small talk", but this would be
expected simply to "test the waters". It should not form the main body of the
discussions, but at
the same time should not be confused with a flow of conversation which could be
quite light -
even fun!
- More interested in themselves than you.
Genuine potential friends are
willing to
have an open conversation. They will be supportive and communicative. Read
through the
suggestions below to help determine the more sincere friendship seekers. The list is
by no means
exhaustive, but should give you a feel for the kind of response to look for.
- An interest in you - i.e. you the individual. An interest that is supportive
more than prying.
- More talk about you rather than themselves once the introductory stage is
past.
- Freeflowing conversation. If you manage to attain complete and unrestrained
conversation,
so much the better.
- Shared interests/hobbies.
- Common aims.
- A "listener" to your viewpoints/problems without being judgemental.
